View Full Version : Need to vent... but not make it overally public ;)
DefensorFortis
04-11-2012, 12:38 PM
Fuck, I need to vent, but make it incognito. I'm fucking pissed off at how life in the Army has turned out. Privacy is a no go for one, and sometimes people just can't have trust in you even though you've shown to be trusted in the past. Plus, hypocrisy runs wild and free like STDs and it's the worst kind: being told you're childish because your family comes to pick you up off post to go home because you don't own a car and they agreed to come pick you up whenever you want to come home, and then once you get yourself a car they say you should milk your parents for all they're worth and bum car insurance off of them even though you're being independent and have your own policy that might be sky high pricey, but still affordable. I'll be brutally honest, I had a soft weak heart and let people push me around, and I've been told by the same people that try to walk over me to not be a bitch. Alright, I heard you, understood, acknowledged, I'll stand up for myself and stop being a bitch. If you get butt hurt over it, well live with it because you created this new monster you wanted. Fuck it. Speak your minds Apaches, sympathy or no sympathy, I have thick skin to take criticism but not childish, hypocritical bullshit.
nastyleg
04-11-2012, 01:23 PM
Ah yes the tricky interpersonal relationship with co workers. For one your family can come on post because you are thier sponsor. Second good for you on getting a car. Look who always needs a ride to syracuse? In the immortal words of a former president " I feel your pain". Look you cent make other people happy all the time. If they can't trust you why should you trust them? Hard lesson learned don't let anyone borrow tour car without thier proof if insurance.
Bro, you are just starting out. I left MEPS with just the clothes on my back and a hygiene kit.....no bank account and no money.
When I hit my first duty station, I strapped on a ruck and used the "heel-toe express" for a year or so before I purchased a car. It sucked, people clowned me...but fuck it. They don't pay your bills.......and at the end of the day you still have your rank and you are still breathing.
Privacy? You can attain that as well...(somewhat) But you'll have to make sacrifices..... You really have no privacy and your rights are limited.
But it's really no one's business but yours when it comes to personal property or family members....unless it's something that got the First Sergeant involved.
And remember trust no one while in garrison.....hell even while deployed you cannot trust anyone 100% when it comes to certain things.
It'll get better as the years pass if you stay on the right path. You can consider it "growing pains"
Don't fall sucker to petty shit....listen to what your gut tells you and do not get influenced by other assholes.
I learned everything the hard way.
Never let ANYONE borrow or use anything of yours
Never LEND money to anyone
Just do your thing and go home,
There are no real friends in the military, and when you do find them it'll only be a few
A lot of stuff that goes on is quite like silly high school shit......just don't get sucked in.
Stark
04-11-2012, 02:46 PM
To be honest the army got only good for me after I have been there for a while, when you become a seasoned soldier so to speak, when you have the respect of your platoon Sargent and you call him Uffz (the German version of Sarge) than things got good for me.
eaglethebeagle
04-11-2012, 04:20 PM
Very good advice above... I remember your post when you were in basic I think with a broken foot? Let me know if I am wrong I am not searching for that post... You are a young man now into a mans world in the military. There are shitty people everywhere in the world including the military. You must be your own man and be sure of yourself and not allow others to dictate how you feel or who you are as a person. If you let others influence you on simple things they will do it in bigger things too.
Learn to let things roll off your back and know in your own head that the shit they are dealing is petty and useless. I have been through many things in my life with regard to alpha dominance and learning pecking order. You of course are to answer to only your superiors not any equals. You are your own man. I dont know what circumstances you are getting into with regard to these things but find ways to better use your time like reading or doing something totally useless like exercising or getting into a self defense gym.
I know you learn training in the military but you can go in your down time as well. Learning grappling and other techniques is of course usefull for your military career but as well great just in general for your self esteem and personal protection.
No one can do to you what you do not allow then to do. If you ever played in team sports growing up you dealt with the locker room shit from other guys. In high school there is always the crew that wants to start shit. Is this stuff just yanking your chain stuff or are they really harassing the fuck out of you? Ignore little shit or talk shit back to them and answer an eye for an eye in that way,
I am not certain this is such a big deal but just in addition to getting accustomed to military life it all adds up to getting a little burned out from time to time, That is when you find that privacy off base when you can. If you got wheels now then you can get away from shit from time to time and let shit stay on base.
Good idea to come here and get others input. You have a good head on your shoulders so dont let some other dude who doesn't have a good head wreck your life. Your in complete control of who you allow to bother you always remember that.
Busting each others balls is a part of things and sometimes it gets overdone and tired. Dont sweat it too much if you can learn to do that. It will all be ok.
One last thing I will add here...my father retired from the Air Force as a Major after 20 years plus of service. The last station he had was in Michigan during that time my mom and him divorced. He had to drag me and my sister up there in the middle of our spring breaks on year. We had to live with another guy who was a tanker pilot in his home until we could get our own place. My dad who was almost 20 years in and a major was sharing a rental home with this guy while up there. So we didnt have a home for a few months and stayed with this single Air Force pilot in this 3 bedroom home.
I remember skipping school one day and he came home and busted me and then proceeded to take my ass to school. I had never seen him much because he stayed at his girlfriends place a lot. He was a good guy and you will see as you get longer in the tooth in your career their are good people in the service more so than the knuckleheads.
Thank you for your service to our country warrior.
DefensorFortis
04-11-2012, 06:27 PM
Bro, you are just starting out. I left MEPS with just the clothes on my back and a hygiene kit.....no bank account and no money.
When I hit my first duty station, I strapped on a ruck and used the "heel-toe express" for a year or so before I purchased a car. It sucked, people clowned me...but fuck it. They don't pay your bills.......and at the end of the day you still have your rank and you are still breathing.
Privacy? You can attain that as well...(somewhat) But you'll have to make sacrifices..... You really have no privacy and your rights are limited.
But it's really no one's business but yours when it comes to personal property or family members....unless it's something that got the First Sergeant involved.
And remember trust no one while in garrison.....hell even while deployed you cannot trust anyone 100% when it comes to certain things.
It'll get better as the years pass if you stay on the right path. You can consider it "growing pains"
Don't fall sucker to petty shit....listen to what your gut tells you and do not get influenced by other assholes.
I learned everything the hard way.
Never let ANYONE borrow or use anything of yours
Never LEND money to anyone
Just do your thing and go home,
There are no real friends in the military, and when you do find them it'll only be a few
A lot of stuff that goes on is quite like silly high school shit......just don't get sucked in.
You put it quite right Pzycho. I never thought of it as my "growing pains" but I still can't believe how long it's taken me to get to the point of getting pissed and wanting to tell people to go fuck themeselves. You're spot on about friends in the military, I only have a few I can consider real friends. I'm starting to listen to my gut more and not let other assholes try to influence me with their stupid shitty ideas. But I'll just have to keep a level head on my shoulders and keep cool.
^^
There will be new chapters and new pains as your rank and responsibility increases. It never ends bro...but it does get better.
I have seen it all and I have been beyond the breaking point a few times when it came to assholes while serving...quite a few times it took me with all my might to maintain a military bearing because it's never worth it to lose pay, reduction in rank and extra duty. A lot of people you will encounter are pussies that hide behind their rank and all they want to do is make your life miserable just because they can....just let it roll off your back.
Take everything in as experience points so that you'll become a better NCO and leader when your time comes...
A year in....I vowed never to be like my dirtbag supervisors. I never treated my troops like shit, I always had their back and would put my rank on the line for them.
BrendenF11
04-11-2012, 08:28 PM
Those are all things that are common in the military bro. Most of the stuff that you deal with is the same in every unit, atleast until you get deployed which will get you rank and respect. Plus remember the military is pretty much a revolving door when it comes to coworkers, there is a constant flow of new guys coming in and other guys getting out. So bear with it and it will pass, plus you can always reclass if ya want and your command approves.
Take advantage of your unit chaplain also, they are nonpartisan, will be nonreligious if you want, and it will be confidential. Plus they are always around and their doors are always open. I went a few times overseas, going through a 9 yr. break up, losing a close friend at home, and overseas, and an aunt all in about 3 week time span. I just went there to vent and get some shit off my chest, did wonders. There is no shame in it either.
Just hold your head high through it all and you'll be fine. Focus on your training and take advantage to other courses that are offered, you'll get promoted quicker and that will bring a new batch of issues but it will be easier.
Clodius
04-11-2012, 08:49 PM
Yo Sixx, can I borrow your car and 5 bucks?
serpa6
04-11-2012, 09:57 PM
Bro, you are just starting out. I left MEPS with just the clothes on my back and a hygiene kit.....no bank account and no money.
When I hit my first duty station, I strapped on a ruck and used the "heel-toe express" for a year or so before I purchased a car. It sucked, people clowned me...but fuck it. They don't pay your bills.......and at the end of the day you still have your rank and you are still breathing.
Privacy? You can attain that as well...(somewhat) But you'll have to make sacrifices..... You really have no privacy and your rights are limited.
But it's really no one's business but yours when it comes to personal property or family members....unless it's something that got the First Sergeant involved.
And remember trust no one while in garrison.....hell even while deployed you cannot trust anyone 100% when it comes to certain things.
It'll get better as the years pass if you stay on the right path. You can consider it "growing pains"
Don't fall sucker to petty shit....listen to what your gut tells you and do not get influenced by other assholes.
I learned everything the hard way.
Never let ANYONE borrow or use anything of yours
Never LEND money to anyone
Just do your thing and go home,
There are no real friends in the military, and when you do find them it'll only be a few
A lot of stuff that goes on is quite like silly high school shit......just don't get sucked in.
DF Sixx said it all and I read you 4x4 When I started I was a piss poor attitude motherfucker but I had a brain to tell me write and wrong No1 do not do what others do 2 dont do something to get your self introuble in another words do something that you think is going to get you to be cool with your fellow soldiers fuck that and fuck them 3 when you gain your rank you will get respect always have someones back no matter weather you like them or not that will bring unspoken respect
I had to bum a ride for every drill yes i use to get harassed like you but you know what i was there every drill. Also gain the respect of your peers it will be hard at first but eventually you will gain there respect remember your peers are going to hard on you for a while that is to make you hard as a fucking rock when comes to doing anything what you think your training is over not yet and not for the rest of your enlistment
When you gain rank and respect just look at people below you just coming out of training and see if they go through the same thing I bet you they do and if you are a squad leader or if your section chief tells you to take a group out and have them clean shit off the tar and they give you smartass remarks drop them for twenty and tell them you think my ass is gonna get in a sling for your wise ass fuck you get down They might hate you then but people are strange you will get the respect and become their peer and they are the ones that will be writing what you have written to start this thread
Also there is way's of venting someone fucks with you take it to the gym and and the ring even if you get beat that person will respect you for not being afraid to stand up to anything and it makes you tuffer The military is not peaches and cream son Treat more like rocks and obstacles Marines have a saying adapt and overcome and never leave no one behind That really stands for all Military personal Remember it
PS Remeber this half them people that try to make you look like a fool probally dont have what you have Family values Your family loves you and if heh they dont like it they are jealous or just plain fools
goinloco1
04-12-2012, 01:04 AM
hell, i never had a car for about 14 mos after basic, i walked or ran everywhere. even after I got a car I did this for most of my first tour down in texas because I enjoyed it. and it didn't matter a hill of beans what the hell others said.
during my whole 22 years before retiring I only have 2 people I completely trust and always will. Ones a command sgt major who knows if he calls I'll do everything in my power to help in whatever way he needs and vice versa. the other is 25yrs old and now out, and its the same thing. hell, he called needing to talk because he's going through some rough times, and i drove 9 hrs just for that.
things will fall in place over time. take what you learn from your first duty and use it when you move to your next.
Its all about letting bs just flow on by and moving on with life and duty.
also a good thing when you can afford it is grab a motel room away from everything over a weekend to justt get away and breath.
Stark
04-12-2012, 04:42 AM
okay, I just bit my fucking lip for the third time now chewing bubble gum - FUCK THAT!!
Anyways, I remember when I finally had my own team to run, I thought all my troubles are over now I am in charge haha, but low and behold new more difficult problems came up, all of a sudden I was responsible for people and I mean responsible for their actions!!!! and you ALWAYS have some fucking joker in your group that makes your life a fucking nightmare, you love the guy but you fucking hate him, its like that little brother you have that starts laughing at the funeral of your granny and you are being looked at as the big brother with an attitude of "its your brother god dammit be a man and show him how to behave on a funeral" - but I do agree, the army is one of THE best places to work in, some people never get it, but I guarantee you there are very few jobs out there that can give you the same amount of fun and challenge, army is all about attitude, you want a quite and boring life - you can have that, you want action and more? You can have that as well, all depends on your attitude.
serpa6
04-12-2012, 08:13 PM
hell, i never had a car for about 14 mos after basic, i walked or ran everywhere. even after I got a car I did this for most of my first tour down in texas because I enjoyed it. and it didn't matter a hill of beans what the hell others said.
during my whole 22 years before retiring I only have 2 people I completely trust and always will. Ones a command sgt major who knows if he calls I'll do everything in my power to help in whatever way he needs and vice versa. the other is 25yrs old and now out, and its the same thing. hell, he called needing to talk because he's going through some rough times, and i drove 9 hrs just for that.
things will fall in place over time. take what you learn from your first duty and use it when you move to your next.
Its all about letting bs just flow on by and moving on with life and duty.
also a good thing when you can afford it is grab a motel room away from everything over a weekend to justt get away and breath.
Dont forget a whore and a 30 pk to its all part of your intel training performing under cover:)
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